Ask your partner the hard questions, talk about the difficult stuff. You know who takes out the trash, where the kids are going to school, what type of starch to use on the shirts. Nothing changes in the development between yourself and the development between you and your significant other. If it might be awkward, if it stirs the pot..ladies and gentlemen, STIR THAT FUCKING POT. The subtle conversations that may make both of you go on edge is not a bad thing. You train hard for something that you are trying to be proficient in. That means putting each other through hard situations or even just as simple as asking “honey, do you like it in the butt?” or Sweetheart, what about a 3 some?” It is all a matter of discussion. Fear is an incredible motivational tool. Just be sure not to make drastic changes that both of you are not on the same page. It is OK, talk with them about what it is that is your kink. Sex aside, but not for long, do either of you have a career change? Of course we all have responsibilities, kids, cars, house, bills, bills, bills, that’s a Destiny’s Child shout out. Gentlemen you’re under the impression that she loves and cherishes you for you, but momma don’t want no scrub. So be honest? Honest is defined as: free of deceit and untruthfulness; sincere. Which of course is the societal norm, but as well be bold. Bold is defined as: (of a person, action, or idea) showing an ability to take risks; confident and courageous. OR (of a person or manner) so confident as to suggest a lack of shame or modesty. Shame is hard to overcome, but if you want what you have to last, or at least if you want it to be something of great worth you are to be bold in how you treat each other. Slap each other on the ass, grab and kiss whenever you want, sneak in on them in the shower, and above all don’t be afraid of showing them any and all emotions that will bring you both together. Shame is defined as: a painful feeling of humiliation or distress caused by the consciousness of wrong or foolish behavior. This is a very open emotion that he or she may feel when discussing how your partner may want to be with you. So be understanding about what each other wants. Remember you’re both individuals, as wanting something sexually is the same as wanting oatmilk in thier coffee instead of regular milk. You make these adjustments even though they may make you feel uncomfortable at first, may just make you feel something else after the fact. Where you want to live, where you want to work, bills need to be paid, but as well seeing someone you love unhappy may not be worth that sports car or manicured grass. These I hope are all things that as couples can be discussed in order to rid yourself of your shame and invest in your individual pursuits. Bangov Actual, out.
