Tag: best women’s relationship help

The reason I address the guys as gentlemen, and ladies as ladies is because I encourage them to act accordingly. Gentleman is defined as: a chivalrous, courteous, or honorable man. This term ” Gentleman” has been pushed and pulled into the meaning of those interpretations of the word. My standards of a gentleman may differ from yours. If a man were to leave a date, even though chivalrous and polite, if the male and female do not have a chemical bond that calls for a second date then the male not be known as a gentleman so please ladies give credit where it is due. Would love to bring back this type of stature. As a means of something for men to strive for or even be taught as a young age in how to treat those around him.

Manners are defined as: polite or well-bred social behavior. You are told to do it because you should be polite. What is not said is that manners are a way of letting people know you have respect for them. It is not about superiority, it is simply a social skill in having those around you feel welcome. I like to think of it as putting on a show in order to entertain or be a good host. With simple manners and common courtesies you can show your date, or even show guests at your home a good time. Gentlemen take charge of a room if necessary in order for those around him to feel safe and welcome. Another meaning of a gentleman comes from women whose need is to feel protected. Really sucks when men are labeled as “protective.” Not that I don’t like the word or actions followed. The interpretation of that can be misconstrued as overbearing or even controlling. Little things a man makes sure to do for his significant other, like when both are leaving a place in 2 separate vehicles. He may wait until she has left, to make sure she has left safely.

Other gestures are walking her to her car, holding her hand as she steps down in heels, and gentlemen if there’s one thing that sets you apart from the guys who didn’t have a shot with her to begin with is a simple asking if she got home OK, or even if you forget, just a simple text asking if she made it home OK. Now all of this sounds nice and can be learned over time, but gentlemen my crown jewel of gentlemanly advice that needs to take place and as well will save you a lot of time and money. BE ON TIME. The importance of arriving early to get a table for the lady, so that both of you are not waiting. It sets a vibe for the entire night that she was the importance of your night. It just sets a mood as well that you’re relaxed and then she can relax as well. Also ladies, BE ON TIME, it is not hard for the guy to wait 15 minutes and think, “well she wasn’t that interested”, so I have left a few dates where the woman was late and made no difference to me. I simply left and sent a text saying sorry I couldn’t wait any longer. Your time is valuable and if they don’t get that from the start they are not worth your time. A Gentleman or a Lady is not about being walked all over, it is an understanding between individuals about the respect they have for each other. As well, gentlemen competition breeds improvement, so learn from those around you, and be the best gentlemen you can be. Bangov Actual, out.

OK gents, let’s just say you have a number. That number is how many mistakes you could make with your dick. When you reach that number, you have it revoked. If you’re religious let’s just say the almighty comes down and says, ” Jim, your dick privileges have been revoked. You’re no longer fit, and I see a great future for you if I am to take this dick away from you.” You ask, ” but God, what am I if I don’t have my dick?” He says, “exactly”, and then he poofs away, or whatever you think he does, beam of light, take your pick. For you non religious folk. Let’s say Robert De Niro, the almighty himself, comes to your doorstep and says, “Jim, your dick privileges have been revoked.” You say, “but why Robert, what am I without my dick? He says, “exactly.” How many occurrences to where your dick gets you in trouble that you have your privileges revoked. Of all the ways you can fuck up your life gentlemen, the dick seems to be overlooked, sex in general just seems to be an urge that most just gloss over because of the privacy of others. For good reason, but just opening up a conversation to yourself would you believe 5, 10 or even 20 mistakes throughout your life is a good enough measure? From a very young age we are taught the consequences of sex. Of course because of our age going through school. They tell us abstinence, hahaha fucking morons. Abstinence is defined as: The act or practice of refraining from indulging an appetite or desire, especially for alcoholic drink or sexual intercourse. So hey kids, all those bodily urges that make your skin feel like it’s on fire, jerk off 9 times a day, and give you a 5th gear in your hormones, ya just ignore that until you’re no longer the states problem, then try your luck in college as a Virgin. I think of it as, well I don’t want to have every guy someone who is inexperienced in sex, women would just be furious if they are having to deal with a guy who can’t lay some pipe. So I’d say over 30, and ladies whether it is with 30 different women, I won’t be able to make that decision, but for a guy who may have his dick revoked, you just never know, they may stop at 29 and think, OK, 30 will be the one. Not like a majority of people know how to pick winners anyway so what does it matter? I’m sure a mountain of hopeless romantics are just biting their lips thinking that they know what it means to love. So I guess I’ll let them have it. Besides when they realize the mistake they have made picking one they fell for after a day, I won’t have to say a thing. They’ll just refer to my blog. The reason I am bringing this up is sexual frustration between men and women. Men and women have a long standing void of quality of sex. What is rarely discussed are the needs of others long term. Where is the relationship seen to go after a year or 2? We are mainly under the assumption that you grow up and old together. So gentlemen think of it this way. What if you were only with your significant other for a specific amount of time? What if with that man or woman you only had 2 years? What if 4 years? Would how many years you’re with them be a reason for the quality of intimacy. Would it be better or worse? What if you only had one week? Studies have shown that the national average for first marriages is around 7-8 years. When you think of it that way, does that seem like a long time? I have friends that have been dating the same person for between 4 and 10 years. Not even married yet. So begs the question, should marriage be a contract that only lasts a number of years? Or does till death do us part seem reasonable still? As well, the biggest reason for divorce was not cheating, or death. LACK OF COMMITMENT. When I hear that, I think of why everything else fails. Whether you find someone or something to commit to, make sure you’re in it for the long haul, or have a conversation beforehand of the expectations throughout the time you’re together. Bangov Actual, out.

Gentleman I hate to be the barer of bad news but sex gets old after a few months. Some men are under the impression that they can do it in the same position over and over again because theory has been told by the women, it is the only way they will achieve orgasm. I call bullshit!!! Do not give in to these lies that can keep you as a prisoner in the missionary position. Not saying you can’t go back to it for the touchdown. I can only assume women need to be put in different positions considering how many nerve endings are in her lady garden being 10 times what is on the tip of your dick. Don’t let this discourage you. Better yet take it as a sign of relief that you are able to surprise her in more ways than one that will have her clinging to you like you paid for it. Gentleman it is a very simple means of google and actually wanting to get out of the sexual funk you both may be in. If it is still hot and heavy, great!! Just know that times of mediocrity, mediocrity being defined as: of only moderate quality; not very good. Or ordinary which is defined as: with no special or distinctive features; normal. Uninteresting, commonplace. These are things that develop from a time of neglect, or times of complacency. Complacency is defined as: a feeling of smug or uncritical satisfaction with oneself or one’s achievements. This happens over the course of years with no direction of improvement. Same goes for companies with no competition, with no reason to become any better of quality, complacency begins to set in and quality control diminishes. Just as a relationship between customers will become distant, a relationship with that special someone will become less and less desirable. Gentleman and ladies, understand the hard truth in the world of relationships, you ALWAYS have competition. If you are not satisfying your man or woman, then that person has no choice but to either do what is necessary to find a new way of doing things. Bring toys into the bedroom, longer foreplay, take classes, get in better shape. If between the two of you, one is not willing to adapt, overcome, grow, or even just simply does not want to go with you on this journey then you may have no choice but to be on your own. Being with someone that is not at your level of encouragement is just like having someone that holds you back. Life is constantly in motion, constantly evolving. When someone says no to you getting the most out of life, then it is harder and harder to live life yourself.  Bangov Actual, out.

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I’m convinced that boys need a male role model, but probably not in the way that you think. For all my military folk, think of it as not being relieved from duty for your entire career in the military. You are stuck on post for 18-20 years. Now think of that in regards to a child where you are the protector of mom, and no man ever comes to relieve you of your duties. You’re on a constant watch. Which may sound more familiar to moms is that when dad is not home, boys are more rowdy, more in the mindset of conditioning in order to prepare for when they must be physical in a defensive altercation. Until dad comes home it’s fight, play, run jump, trampoline or play with swords and guns. Now to think of what men do when they see a boy, they may even do the same in order to test his strength and worthiness to protect the castle. You can learn a lot from a 6 year old when you pay attention. I encourage any man entering a household with growing boys to be cautious. You may just be entering a nerf war, the floor is lava, or may have to fight to the death so that the princess can be rescued from the top of the castle. Be aware the princess can be a hamster or a 2 year old pup with a ribbon tied around the neck. I don’t want to say more than ever that we need little boys to have strong male role models in the household because it has always been a necessity for future generations to have a role model to emulate. Now to think of this in a business sense, always remember problems are never big or small. Just as our successes can be perceived as big or small, it was the intended goal that made us fall short. For example for those who want to be billionaires, and make only millions. Money should never be the goal, not that I will ever say you cannot wish for that but things in life that are to be wished for IN MY OPINION are those of importance like preparing our youth for the inevitable battles they may face in order to preserve their way of life. These skills of dealing with another male, whether they know them or not, will be life lessons they will carry with them till they know what it is to be in charge of their own lives. They will know the strength, courage, and more importantly the sacrifice necessary in order to sustain and provide for a family of their own. Just as my father had taught me not with words, but with actions. As long as you are present in their lives then the impact is just as important if they were not there for you. You learn from each other. A man learns how to teach the son, the son learns through rebellious acts how to do exactly as the father did to his father in order to prove he is worthy of his own way of life away from the protection from the man that has shown him one of the great joys of life of being a role model/teacher to another. Role model is defined as: a person looked to by others as an example to be imitated. To my younger readers, we cannot always choose our fathers. I have met plenty of children to where fathers are nowhere to be found, I have also met fathers that I wish never reproduced. Be mindful of who you imitate in this world. Those who think you don’t have a choice, just remember that you can always see the man you don’t wish to become. Then spend the rest of your life saying you will be better. Commit to it, and make it part of your life’s pursuit. Bangov Actual, out.

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Confidence, ladies, a woman with Confidence has a man by something even more precious to him than his balls. Confidence is defined as: feeling of self-assurance arising from one’s appreciation of one’s own abilities or qualities. Or the feeling or belief that one can rely on someone or something; firm trust. My question to you is why would you trust someone even more than yourself? Well by definition is someone who has a particular ability such as greater size, strength, or ability to defend. Then ladies, historically men have been viewed as the protectors of the castle, man of the house, Papa bear, take your pick. This is only one example of course. For men or women who have a particular skill set that you don’t have, you are forced to have confidence in those you hire to fix problems, that in which you do not possess the skill to do so. Could be a plumber, electrician, cosmetologist, whatever that you have not put effort into in order to become proficient in. Ladies It has recently been brought to my attention that some women lose confidence in themselves as they age. Which to me seems like a step backward. What is it that makes a woman, particularly one that has had children, become a success in her field of study or career, or even been able to keep her sanity through harsh times of family turmoil or trauma. Can we all agree that families go through harsh times. So no need for specifics, but when a woman says to me with age, confidence begins to dwindle. What does it mean when a child is in the developing stages of confidence, generally preschool where children are exposed to who can run faster, jump higher or even read at a higher level. What I have also learned is that throughout age, generally the older you get, the less confidence you have. Generally 50’s and 60’s shows a lack of self esteem. So IN MY OPINION, What I advise for both men and women is for you to look at the evidence throughout your life and see yourself for what you are and what you have done, rather than pick an afternoon to tell yourself that you are worthless than what the evidence shows. If by your 50’s and 60’s you have accomplished little to nothing, which is highly doubtful to a large majority of the population to never have had at least one accomplishment, then so be it you’re a loser. Those of you who know and are still trying to lie to yourself and say that you haven’t accomplished anything then you know deep down that is not true. Again the evidence may not lay all your doubts to rest, but at least you will know deep down that they are only doubts. Doubts will be with you till the end of time. The only way to subside them for the duration of your life is to develop a pursuit. That pursuit keeps people sharp as well as distracted by what they are incapable of doing. They only focus on the positive because they enjoy what they are doing. Self-esteem is defined as: confidence in one’s own worth or abilities; self-respect. So to circle back to confidence being about appreciation of abilities or qualities, I vote that we all transition to self respect, which is defined as: pride and confidence in oneself; a feeling that one is behaving with honor and dignity. This being a more concrete approach to one’s self development, I am in favor of us moving from what we try and teach our children, which is self-esteem, and transition as adults, to self-respect and let confidence be the byproduct of that. Above all, change how you define yourself and you will be ever evolving in this world of motion. Bangov Actual, out.

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When to say “I love you.” This is a tricky one for most, and also for most we go off a feeling, a vibe that it has been a while. What is worse is some will even go off the pressure that they have been dating for 6 months and they think they have to say it or the relationship is over. Don’t be that person. Think to yourself, why? Why would I say I love this person? Have you asked yourself enough questions about it? Or are you just saying it to say, “eh fuck it?” According to a 6000 person study done by okcupid, 62% of people think “I love you” should be when it is felt, 22% after several months and 3% are on the after a year train. Generally most of over 30 it is 6-9 months and under 25 it is like 20 min, or as soon as she touches your wee wee or hoo ha. So everyone has their timeline or specific moment of realization. So what do we do? Do we look at love as a series of longevity. If you both stick around for a year then you get to say it to each other. Or is it 6 months that when we see that person do something nice for you in the kitchen and then it just comes out? As always I like to let others decide their intended path of discovery for nobody should be in control of your experiences and/or intended choices you make except you. “I love you” is very powerful, and can be used for great intentions, or very bad ones just like all other forms of communication. When you say hello, even that can be in either an aggressive or friendly manner. So don’t think “I love you” is any different from being able to communicate how you feel about someone. IN MY OPINION, do not focus so much on the words as they are words that can be thrown out just like saying hello. It is the specific intent behind them that needs more focus. Try not saying it. Try being the person who does whatever is possible in order to show that special someone that you are devoted to them. Countless efforts on your part through the time you spend together. Whether it be 6 months or 6 years, the time and effort you put into it, you will have “I love you” bursting out of your chest and you will want to sing it from the hills of Narnia. So just be patient and focus on the work that goes into saying “I love you.” When it comes time -to say it, it will not only feel right, but evidence will make it undeniable. Undeniable is defined as: unable to be denied or disputed. Bangov Actual, out.

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