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Why Is It Hard To Plan Dates?

What do I do with my spouse, uh make a list? Why is it so hard to do something with the people that we supposedly love? Want to spend the rest of your life with this person, or are we just dating “place holders?” Till you find the one that you’ve really been wanting to be with. The one you dream of. Love is a beautiful thing, but can distract you at times from the bigger picture. This is why people say love is not enough, because life doesn’t just end there when you find someone at 19. You have another part of you that is invested in a whole other ideology and self image of what could be. Just imagine if you had a little more confidence in yourself, really ask yourself would you be with the person that you are with right now? It is a delicate fabrication of what you’re willing to do and how far you are willing to push yourself. Sucks if they are nice people. You can’t help it, the fire inside you just needs to come out sometime. It either gets released or it dies. Then what is to become of you? Are you ready for it to be put to rest or are you young and feel too much pressure stuck in a life that you did not want but inevitably had to fall into to please those around you. It is hard to please everyone, so don’t. You can only go forward based on the vision you have in your head and taking steps to fill in blanks. Take a walk and ask is this present that you’re in what feels fulfilling. If so, then I have nothing more to say. If you want more, then you are going to have to disappoint everyone that has a different vision for your life. This is not just a couples thing either. Being single and picturing more than just the bullet points in life keeps you from getting stuck. Ask your significant other what they want to do Friday night. If he or she does not know, welp you now have free range to do whatever the fuck you want. Go bowling, go dancing, go make pottery. The fact of doing things that you don’t even like opens your world up to communication. Doing things you don’t like inevitably just enforces you will pay more attention to that special someone in your life. Talking with them or creating memories in my opinion are the time stamps of your relationship. If one or both parties is not interested in how to spend time with each other……..well you decide the ending of that story. The title is, “Why Is It Hard To Plan Dates.” Well that is because you are still dating the person even if you are married to them. Never really shifts into “look!, we made it.” You are going to have to date for as long as you are together, so make sure that someone is someone you will have the kind of fun you want with. If you want to snack, Netflix and chill, do that. Or if you choose to go out for a drink and let loose once a month, then great. Either way having 2 lists I think is great, big vacations and small dates to do once a week. Having a hard time making a list, holy fuck google you monkey. Tons of articles on what to do with your squeeze when you both want to be in or  out. Bangov Actual, out!

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Battle Of The Sexes..Gentlemen We’re Losing

The battle of the sexes is in its 2nd phase and men are losing the war. I have constantly been told by women that men are not men anymore. Gentlemen, I get your argument, “well they wanted equality right?” That doesn’t mean you throw in the towel because a small group of women want one thing. Your intention was to listen to the news and neglect women who still like the tradition. What kind of small minded individual takes the mainstream news media as a way of life??? It is one perspective you monkey’s. Holding hands, holding doors open, holding her purse when she is trying to get situated. Dating is a hell of a time, don’t get me wrong. Women who don’t know what they want, no drive, no ambition for a better future. Not financially driven, or worse they want sexually what scares the Jesus right out of you religious ones. Ladies this goes for men too. These issues are not generalized to one side.. All this being said, it is hard for both men and women because fundamentally we do not communicate anymore. You’re stuck inside and lack the communicable skills to even approach a woman in a bar. Nightclubs are too loud for me, grocery store, I mean holly fuck just saying hi my name is… is enough to get you both nervous. Be polite, and if they say no, guess what around the corner is another one, around that corner is another corner, and inevitably you’ll find a parking lot of women. What blows me away is men are still stuck on the marriage and divorce scare. I’ll admit I am in that club. I want every man to look up the 7 different alternatives to marriage and choose one that best fits you. Till death do us part, fuuuuuck that shit. Literally anything can be legally entrusted to your spouse through an attorney. Also Gentlemen this is what I am being told by women, none of this is even me complaining, this is from the perspective of women ready for a man, but who have given up looking. They are perfectly happy, financially well off with their careers, raising children, big house and are KILLING IT. If this intimidates any guys out there, great!  You are not allowed to procreate. If this does not pertain to you, understand that marriage is not what it has been. Imagine a life where you don’t have to live with the women you’re married to. You want to fuck other people, be in an open marriage. Some of you would starve, but they have more incentive to learn other skills. Cooking, cleaning, dancing, how to dress, groom yourselves, and I know some of you have never felt a good shave, fresh suit, and even know what aftershave is and IT.IS.DISGUSTING…For men and women, to create a world for yourself is so easy nowadays. Do not look to those around you because you’ll just fall into the same traps they did. Married for the wrong reason, kids as an anchor for the marriage to work. Wanting more out of life you may have to be selfish, but in the end it saves both you and others heartache. Communication we have all heard is key to a great relationship. It is the most basic bitch answer on any show you watch. Morning show, daytime television, Dr. Phil, take your pick. What they don’t tell you is you should be in good Communication before you even get into something long term. Talk, listen, learn, grow, Bangov Actual, out!

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Competition Fuels Your Desire

It is Interesting when you ask someone what their hobbies are. They either have a ton or none. It’s either they run, swim, hike, dance, or sing. Hobbies are addictive, they give you something to strive for without having the pressure of success. You can do them at your leisure. So why is it that a business is different? Why don’t we think of business and individual hobbies or pursuits as a leisurely thing. You spend money to do one and the other you make money. Let’s just understand those who have it all together, make those two things become one in their life. Being able to make your hobby or passion be your income is a very beautiful thing. Hunting fishing, dancing, singing. All wonderful things if you can establish a business out of it. When is it that it kicks in for you that if you’re not moving forward, you are stagnant, or you’re going back. So challenge yourself whenever you get the chance. Utilize your hobbies to transfer into your pursuits, whichever they may be. Competition is a breeding ground for those looking for that rush in their life. Stop thinking it is only for those to prove themselves, even that being true, is that really a bad thing? It is a community of individuals who are trying to better each other by bringing their best to the table in all aspects of a competitive nature. Just like anything you will get from my blogs, if you’re in a negative state of mind you will get negative results. So think of what it may mean to you to be competitive and think positively about it and you’ll find a fuel inside that drives you to new heights. Positive, positive positive, wake up this way and you’ll be ahead of those whose days are filled with regret and even may bring them out of it. I hope to one day use my hobbies as a means of income for those in search of their own pursuits. Competition only has a disdain for those who don’t like to lose. Nothing wrong with losing, especially if you are new to whatever you are doing. You’re expected to fail because those who know what to do with failure end up being the most competitive. Not because they are big and scary, or mean, it is all mental. So is money, so again the excuse of “I am just not good enough,” is a lie you can tell yourself for the rest of your life. If you have a hobby, great, if you don’t get your ass off the couch and go find something you’re passionate about. I mean holy fuck, even a gamer will get pumped if they get 20 kills on Call Of Duty. I don’t know for sure if it is 20, I made that up, but I have seen those competitions and they get intense. So don’t think just because you are overweight, or can’t run fast that you can’t be competitive. That is a lie as well, so after all the excuses are gone and the dust settles which one are you going to choose? Bangov Actual, out.

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A Case Of Over Indulgence

Most of you won’t get this till it is time. Like waves on a beach. Will come a time where all of this will seem like a memory, dejavu even. Just the same old slopes you’ve been going down and around. You’ll tend to see a different side of things and then everything else that bothered you before will seem irrelevant. You’ll be heading down that bunny slope looking for big air, but it’s a bunny slope so you’re going to look for the next challenge. Will never end. Pursuits are not supposed to end, just what you get out of them are supposed to be another piece of the puzzle missing from your life. Life, relationships, sex, business. The things you get in life pursuits will always be a greater than what you get from quick fixes like brownies, or sugary things, and there are 2 things in life I destroy, that is pizza…(get your mind out of the gutter) and a box of doughnuts. I have a wicked sweet tooth that every so often comes back with a vengeance. Holiday parties I have to have someone watch me so I don’t overload on sweets. I will eat myself sick. That being said I am like a fat kid with cake just trying to fill the void of something that I truly want. The pursuit is always there but sometimes I just lose track and before you know it I am in a line at Cinnabon with NO SUPERVISION, and I will order 4, no real reason. I even lie to the lady at the counter and say “yes I need these for a party.” Party is in my mouth BITCH! Then I go home and after all of them are consumed and I am being pg saying they are consumed. More like they are engorged by a sea serpent from the Nile. After the fact that it is over, and I have been found with belt open and napkin on the ground, I lay in my own wake as to be licked by my dog trying to get the last remaining filling off my forehead. I realize this is what it means to be where I am now and not be moving forward. The void is still there. The void is still in existence because I am still who I am. The choice to be better was shattered as soon as the decision was made to steer off the path. Could of probably been satisfied with a smoothie or something that would not put me in a coma for the next 4 hours while I binge watch romantic comedy’s and cry. Then again, tomorrow is another day. Know that it will be hard, because no matter if you go to the gym for 3 weeks, your cheat day depending on the severity will always be how you feel the next day, like you are starting over. So the key word is consistency. Choose what you would like to be consistent in. Cinnamon rolls, or steps to making yourself feel better and life more meaningful. We are all trying to make some sort of consistency work in our lives. Be consistent in your attempts, and see where it gets you. Bangov Actual, out.

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Talk About Added Value

I have only thought of being a father a billion times. I choose to wait because I am not ready to give my attention to that. Also have not found the woman yet in order to make that work. I am assuming we still need 2 to tango or am I just an old man now? Have always had a huge admiration for fatherhood, motherhood as well but I am not a woman. Just the thought of having my own little me running around and the responsibilities of guiding him/her either which way. Sports, science, history, math. Where should his focus be? Do I go off how the economy is now, or what it may be in 20 years? Don’t want to try and predict the future, what if I am wrong? What does my wife want, it is her kid too, what does she see for our little one? Lots of questions, it is no wonder I haven’t wanted to have children, I could barely make any of these decisions for myself 10 years ago. Just wasn’t my perspective of life. I was too wild and crazy to focus on future me. I always had a vision of what I wanted or what I saw myself as. I think we all do, just don’t want to be wrong in my attempts. Haha which is hilarious because being wrong is exactly how I am able to write to you now. Taking the long way around just means I have done things out of focus that mean more to me than being the focus of all the attention. I like hunting, hiking, shooting and things that others may not see but are very special to me to get to experience. Which brings me to being a father, when I think of how I want to be if the time ever comes where I have a child. I want to not be so focused on their future that I forget to have one of my own. I am never going to be able to control all aspects of their life and I would hope that he/she would do what I did to find their own happiness. Control is not the method to my madness, but to guide and inspire and that has been my mission from the start. I want my children to experience the world for themselves, no safety nets, no false senses of security that get in the way of them getting all they can out of their experiences. This definitely hits home with me because it is such a big step. I would like to establish myself a little more and have a little more forethought in raising a child instead of just having one and it be like going through the motions. I suggest to everyone take a little time in adding more value to their lives. Quality vs quantity is a real thing and for me I just want my impressions on my children to mean something that will inspire them to be better than me, for the world around them. Bangov Actual, out.

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Whew!, Glad I Made It Out Of There Alive

I told myself i was going to go to bed now but as you are reading I am still up and typing away for my mind has no bounds when it comes to sleep deprivation. For me sleep has always been a, “eh I will get to it when I get to it.” Kind of like chores, or having to do homework. My principal and I were very well acquainted, my straight c report card was not going to mail itself. For this I will say high school for me was not the standard educational practices. They definitely had those to some degree. I just chose to look at school as more of a social experiment to maneuver while in close quarters with other mouth breathers, and people who think they had it all figured out by age 17. Was not in the popular crowd, did not drink, did not smoke, and yet I found myself in very close proximity of these people all the time. Understand if you have teenagers, they are into some weird shit. It’s OK unless they start torturing animals, but that’s for you to figure out just how weird it is. When any group of teenagers get together, you have hormones raging, fireworks, light shows, making pizzas in an oven for 50 people in the guest house. Drunk and passed out on the couch, sail boat cover, in a sea of cheerleaders, or my personal favorite was 5 sitting in a circle with heads rolled back to high to get up. Yes prom night was fun. When do we cut off lost causes? What age is that not appropriate? I mean we as a society are OK with our 20’s nearly comatose from alcohol. Then you can’t forget about dirty 30’s. I am there now and it is pretty fun considering I am still trying to build everything I have invested in. This also coming from a guy who used to clean Department buildings. Vacuum, scrub floors, toilets. Don’t be someone who justifies your existence by what you do for a living, because that is what others are already doing for you. Just keep your head up and keep moving forward. What makes sense to you now will make sense to those when they are ready to see it. Even these 5 high in a circle could be a doctor or lawyer some day, I choose to not put people in that bubble. They have aspirations and dreams all their own and even older now I am sure I will have my day I just need to let go and will find myself looking for my own sail boat cover to lay in after a night of boozing. For now your reality is only a thin fabric of who you are and at any moment you are more than capable of starting a new avenue that may just be a better fit for your lifestyle. Always be thinking of improvement, it is not greedy to think how your life can be better, the more you do for yourself, the more you can do for others. Bangov Actual, out.

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Be Your Own Example

I had sex, and I liked it…OK not really , kind of going through a dry spell, but if that doesn’t get your attention then what will right? Establish what really “motivates” you. When you look at your lives and think that they could be any other way. Really define who you are now and define who you choose to be in this world. It is one of your biggest freedoms looking at the life you have and the life that you want to live for the rest of it. Doesn’t matter how old you are and the younger you are the less excuse you have because you have so much life left to live and time is on your side. The older you are I don’t want to hear any shit from you either, you have all the experience that life had to offer and you tend to use it as a way of superiority. You may be thinking well this guy doesn’t know what he is talking about. Literally every generation we have had to right the wrongs that we have had to endure in the past. Anything you bitch about now you have been bitching about for years and have never been the one to change it. You don’t have the power, money, grew up in the right family, bitch, bitch, bitch, moan, moan, moan. The less you tend to complain the more clear headed you are about making decisions for the better. I was once told by a gym teacher, ya, my mentors were pretty big back then. What he said was for some reason, “complaining never got anything done.” Now I may lose readers just off that alone, but just for a second, for the simplicity of that statement just know that I hate it as well. For how simple it is, just the most annoying words ever put together, it almost has a unscented, non flavored ice cream vibe to it. Like 2+2=4 No. Fucking. Shit. What is even worse is 13 years later I am bringing it up on my blog in trying to tell others that an age difference does not justify how you get to act, feel, or react to certain situations when they may be the very thing standing in the way of getting you to where you want to be. Bitch and complain all you like, scream in your pillow, punch your car, get into a fight with a bee hive. Whatever has been told you, that has made you think you are not good enough, or that you can’t be the person you aspire. Just know that they are wrong. They are on the wrong side of evolution to think that they get to decide what you are capable of. Whoever is still telling you these things, no matter the situation you need to get very far away from them. They are on their way down to rock bottom, and if you are in reach they will pull you down with them. Let’s try and be a good influence on people out there. Bangov actual, out..

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